If you recall we have previously mentioned about the disease of more, a
term coined by Pat Riley with the mere initiative to teach us about how
greed corrupts the human mind.
When we fail to consider the consequences, what ensues is greed,
unchecked ambition, perpetual dissatisfaction and a life from which there is
no escape from the decadent.
Regardless of how rich you are, you feel poor. Regardless of how much
you have, you need more. No matter how great you are according to every
external metric, to yourself, you need to be more.
Trust me when I say: the quest for endless self- improvement is very
messed up.
In pursuit of more and more growth at any cost, multinational companies
compromise their ethics; marketers sink to scammy tactics; and we as
individuals spiral downward into a bottomless pit, in which we aren’t
enough, don’t have enough, and are unfulfilled.
We are constantly complaining and demanding from ourselves for more. As
a generation we are highly addicted to achievement.
We have never in the past questioned this addiction. I guess even I am
questioning this addiction myself whilst I’m writing this blog.
It seems like a lot of things make sense now.
Do you realise one thing? The more your achievements, the more external
validation you receive from society.
And we humans very easily give into the bandwagon of validations and
comparisons and competitions amongst each other and even ourselves.
Enough talk about the disease, it’s high time we talk about the antidote.
- Be Ready To Fight Hedonic Adaptation
Because we judge our happiness based on where we are in relation to
other people, the thing we thought would lead to eternal happiness never
does. At some point, everything that was once a distant dream becomes a
part of your day-to-day reality.
The “high” from getting a highly paid content writing job lasted me about 2
months.
Prior to getting the job, my basis for comparison was other people who
didn’t have a blogging job.
Even though I got recognition, I thought my career as a writer was a failure
as I wasn’t as popular as Heidi Cohen or Jeff Goins.
These top bloggers became my new basis for comparison, this drove me to
new levels of anxiety and drifted my attention towards hustling and
struggling with making more and more achievements.
So here’s how a hedonic treadmill works. Our external achievements just feel like band-aids on bullet wounds.
Turning inward is the only viable long term solution to dealing with hedonic adaptation.
You have to learn to give yourself everything you’ve been seeking from
others.
Everything you’re searching for is within you. But, As a culture, we
constantly look outside of ourselves for answers.
We look for so many things outside of ourselves: validation, satisfaction,
permission, love. We base our happiness on factors we can’t control and
our lives get filled with unmet expectations.
Here is what you got to do: STOP LOOKING FOR EXTERNAL VALIDATION
2. Don’t Place Your Heroes on Pedestals
We rarely consider the idea that there’s a hidden danger in looking up to
our heroes and role models. We worship them but don’t see what goes into
their accomplishments.
On occasion, I’ve seen people comment on a speaker they saw at a
conference and say “I love this person.” No, you don’t. You love their
persona, the brand, the version of them that was on the stage, the version
of them that wrote the book.
3. Escape The Filter Bubble Immediately
It’s hard to have your own definition of success when you’re consuming an
endless stream of Instagram pictures, status updates, and Facebook ads.
At the core of all this “social media” is behavior manipulation designed to
do one thing: sell your hopes, dreams, and attention span to advertisers.
You are trapped in a bubble of other people’s intentions and you don’t even
realize it.
We are already living in the matrix. We’re plugged into our devices, our
social networks, and the websites we visit every day. But instead of one
matrix, we have several. They’re called social networks, search engines,
and apps. And our devices are the vehicles that enable us to plug in.
● Facebook is not reality
● Twitter is not reality
● Instagram is not reality
All of them are a glimpse, a mere window into people’s lives.
If you ignore the fact that you experience life through a filter bubble, you’ll
never feel like you will stay chained to the hedonic treadmill.
Quit social media or reduce your use of it dramatically. When you do this,
you’ll notice that you can think more clearly, be more objective and make
better decisions that aren’t just emotional reactions to digital stimuli.
Realize that nobody on the internet is living the life you think they are and
you’ll be less filled with envy and comparison.
4. Define enough
Most of us choose arbitrary goals like becoming a millionaire or having
“tonnes” of money. We let the world around us shape our belief systems
instead of shaping the world based on OUR belief systems. Maybe you
don’t need a million dollars to have everything you’ve wanted. Maybe you
don’t need a yacht, a jet, and a mansion with an infinity pool. Maybe you
do. But until you define how much is enough, you’ll live a life of scarcity.
We measure lives with quantifiable metrics instead of meaning.
Fight the disease of more and tell yourself you are more than enough
because trust me bud, you are!
